Feb 21, 2018

2 THE CHALLENGE OF PATIENCE AND TOLERANCE

Commuting into the city everyday at times can be an exercise in patience and tolerance. Some days it's like climbing a steep mountain in wet flipflops with a 20 gallon jug of water on your head .

This morning my commute to work was akin to a steep mountain climb in wet flipflops and a 20 gallon jug of water. I had to breathe deeply with a prayer on a continuous loop in my brain as I employed my patience and rachet up my tolerance. While the first trek of my journey was fairly uneventful the second leg proved anything but. I put away my my lastest novel MAVERICK by Lora Leigh  and made my way to the streetcar platform.

The designated waiting area for the streetcar was packed. There were two very long lines with dozens of kids on a school trip. I watched the notification clock - 15 minutes. I sighed as the numbers slowly decreased. In front me, beside me, behind me people complained and mumbled their displeasure at the long wait. I breathe deeply and waited.

After 15 minutes the streetcar arrived. It was pandemonium. We were all packed in. I was to the very front with no wiggle room. It was noisy as the kids chirped away loudly. By the third stop an elderly causcasian woman got up and attempted to push her way pass me. I said, "I ma'am I am not able to move. When the driver stops at your stop and open the door we will make room for you to exit." "It is stopped now, move," she said. She is literally in my face. I pulled back slightly took a deep breath and repeated, "ma'am I am not able to move, as soon as the driver stops at your stop and opens the door we will make room for you to exit."  She looks at me and sneers, "you just think you own the world don't you." I looked at her and said, "stop it." She starts again and this time the driver tells her, "ma'am they cannot move, I will open the door the next stop and you will have room to get out." She looks at me and started to argue. I said while I pray for patience and tolerance, "stop it, stop this, we will make room for you to leave, just stop."

The streetcar arrives at her stop and people step off temporarily, I was able to move out of the way for her yet she began to argue again. The driver said to her, "enough, look everyone made room for you to pass, be joyful, stop this, have a blessed day." She did not even say thank you. I thought, 'sweet Lord give me strength and endurance to navigate peoples ignorance. The next stop was mine. I was glad to be off and be done with it at least for the next 8 hours.

Feb 16, 2018

6 Be Careful What You Teach Yourself

If you teach yourself
To fool yourself
Then eventually it will be hard for to believe in yourself
Be careful of the habits you cultivate.
D.S.B.S.Rhapsody©All rights reserved.

Jan 29, 2018

6 SUNSETS

Even as I am privileged to capture the glory
of the sunset my camera still does not do
it justice. Sometimes I wish my camera could
see the sunset and all its complex beauty the way
my eyes do. Alas I capture in my mind what 
my camera cannot. I am thankful


Sunsets for me is renewal, a sign of hope.

Jan 23, 2018

20 Dealing with Betrayal

Angelica - Spanish LI (2)“Betrayal is the experience of being set up, violated and then being discarded. It is being used by someone who violates our dignity and then is unmoved by our pain.” –Dan B. Allender Ph.D, The Healing Path.
Wow, this is so true. I reread this at least 5 times because it just resonated so deep with me. I am too familiar with this experience. The feeling is horrendous.
Each of us has experience betrayal in our lives and will more than likely experience it in our futures, how we heal, take care of ourselves, our hearts and spirits and move on from those acts of duplicity is important to our growth and happiness. We need to find a healthy means of dealing with the pain and allow ourselves to grieve lost relationship(s), disappointment(s) and betrayal(s) and not get stuck in the anger, pain and rage. We need find healthy ways of working through trials and not fall into self-blaming and self-depreciation self-talk. We owe it to ourselves to teach to be our best selves for our self and learn to manage our expectations of others.
“Regardless of who is in your life to support and love you, your happiness is your responsibility; to forfeit that responsibility of self is to invite heartbreak and disappointment to take up residence in your spirit indefinitely.” –D.S.B.S.Rhapsody

Graffiti Art taken by me D.S.B.S. Rhapsody (Bathurst & Queen) Toronto, Ontario Canada

Jan 14, 2018

6 HAVE YOU CONSIDERED YOUR OWN BOUTS OF INCONSIDERATIONS?

Blessings....
I am lying on my bed here "soaking". I am thinking about nothing in particular while I post some of my photographs from fall to ignite some assertive colors into a some what grey day. As I post the last of 3 photos a question filter through my mind.  Have you considered your own bouts of inconsiderations? Hmmmmm is my immediate response as a thought occurs to me. 'This contemplation of owned inconsiderations' is "share" worthy.

TRAIN OF THOUGHT
Often times we dwell on the hurts and betrayals we've suffered. The inconsiderations we are sometimes subjected to. In trying to cope with these experiences we share with others who are willing to listen (without judgment - we hope) the experiences relaying the depths of our hurts to garner support, understanding, empathy and some strategic skills to help us deal with the impact and residual effects. All of which is healthy because it is paramount to moving forward with our lives and NOT becoming STUCK in pain.

However in our quest to heal, to get over, to triumph we can get self-righteous and forget our own humanness and not considered our own short comings, those we have hurt knowingly and unknowingly. What have you done to right those wrong? How have you risen up and ask for forgiveness? Or have you? Have you apologized? Or are you STUCK in the shame, guilt, self-disgust of your behavior and in so doing isolated yourself?

As human beings it is virtually impossible to live and not bruise others. However all is not lost as we can choose to live consciously, be present and mindful of our actions, words and deeds and the impact. It is wise to remind ourselves that words have power, no one likes being devalued, deliberately humiliated and continuously debased for poor choices and the consequences that followed as a result.

The reality is this, you may not be ready to forgive or hear an apology and life of the relationship as far as you are concerned is dead, there is nothing wrong with that. You are simply not there yet and the relationship irreparable. The same is true for those you may ask for forgiveness. You may not be forgiven. Your apology may not be accepted and the relationship irreparable in their eyes. The point is to take the necessary steps to heal and move into acceptance.

ACCEPTANCE
Acceptance does not mean all is well. It does not mean you are ok with what has happened. It does not mean you agree or are agreeable. It simply means you accept what is, what you cannot change, where you are not ready or willing to go. In short, "it is what it is" and wishing it wasn't does not make it not so.

What are your thoughts?
What say you?
Are you able to accept not being forgiven by someone you've hurt?

D.S.B.S Rhapsody
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