Aug 21, 2016


On my mind in this moment:

I often find myself with a particular thought and or concept that will take hold and will not let go until I have written it down, either pen to paper or letters to blog. Hence my entry today is titled….BE YOU.

graffiti for post

If who you are and who you aspire to be is solely dependent upon how others see and perceive you. Then you are in trouble. You see, who you are now and who are to become cannot and should not be solely predicated upon others ideas, ideals, philosophies and ideologies. Though some of what you see, hear, experience and learn will undoubtedly shape and influence you to some degree it cannot be all that you are.

It is important to learn the value of you, in you. Go on the adventure of the “I” and learn the lessons inherent in living that are specifically designed for you. Learn how to respect and honor yourself and create standards, ethics, ethos and philosophies that support that and though you may discover that you are flawed like the rest of us homo-sapiens. Like the rest of us, you will find the wisdom in self-acceptance and gain the understanding that you are enough and perfectly imperfect.

Just, Be you, you will find that you will be better at it than trying to be someone other than. After all, you are the only one living with you 24/7, 365.



Aug 7, 2016

21 As I am

---This week’s willful reminder---
I Am Enough As I am
Red heart
“If you figure out what perfectness look like, taste like, feel like, live like, walk like, talk like, smile like, survive like, love like, forgive like, give like, take like and what is required to achieve it, maintain it and sustain it, let me know, till then I’ll remain As I Am, a imperfectly imperfect work in progress learning from my mistakes and from those of whom I am blessed to be privy too, consciously and mindfully applying the lessons to my continuing journey through life as I move forward.”
Written by D.S.B.Rhapsody 2010 © all rights reserved

Jul 30, 2016

8 Drama–Sometimes your neighbour’s drama ends up being your drama

Comic book door knocking
4:26 am there is a banging coming from somewhere in the building I had just gotten up for a bathroom run with all intention of going right back to sleep, ha, what a joke. The fool whoever he was kept that noise up till 5:25 am. He went from banging to slamming, to kicking, to knocking, to what sounded like full body throws against the door. The way my building is set up sounds carry through. Finally in what must have been desperation the man went into pleading, calling her name which to my ear wasn’t comprehensible followed by, “honey, please, let me in, honey, open the door.” I texted the Super just before 5am but by 5:25 am I just about had enough. I got out of bed, pulled up my blinds and shouted, “If you don’t stop that incessant banging I will call the police!” it was like a take a ghetto take from one of those movies in the hood. I laugh to myself thinking, ‘woman, you couldn’t just call the Super?’ The end result, it worked, he stopped banging and pleading, only now, I can’t sleep.
*Sigh – Sometimes you do not always have the luxury of not getting involved, instead you are involuntary pulled into someone’s drama that in the subtext has nothing to do with you yet it impacts due to proximity.

Jul 23, 2016

16 Communication - Speaking without words, a conversation on a crowded bus

Coming from a Caribbean culture where the eyes and facial expressions in communication is just a potent as words and hand gestures’ I find myself in an unexpected situation that required I access those very innate practices.

On the last leg of my journeyed commute to work

I sat in the crowded bus to work doing some entertainment reading "Never Love A Lawman" by Jo Goodman. When the automated system announced the third to last stop to my destination and then stopped to pick up passengers. I closed my tablet, put it in my bag and sat back till my stop.

Passengers boarded the bus amongst them was a young man in his late 20s to early 30s who stood at first off to the side of me. I will call him Mr. No Words. I smelt him before I saw him. People shuffled around making room for more passengers and Mr. No Words ended up directly in front of me. I looked up briefly, one because the scent seemed closer and two to acquaint myself to those around me. Mr. No Words looked like he smelt, as if he’d rolled out of bed after not showering the night before and left the house without changing or showering. His camouflage three quarter shorts and stained white T-shirt were wrinkled and he had crust in his eyes and bridle drool on the left corner of his mouth. He looked straight ahead. The bus was packed. I quickly scanned the crowd around me mentally assessing the best exit plan for when I reached my stop. I surmised since I was closest to the front door I would exit there. I gauged roughly how much people I'd have to weave myself through and sat back patiently.

As I sat mentally organizing my work day I suddenly felt it, a slight pressure on my left knee. I registered it but dismissed it as the bus made a jerky stop start. Then, I felt it again, only the pressure was more significant and the bus was driving smoothly. I became a bit uncomfortable and thought, 'is he deliberately pushing on my knee?' I advised myself to pay attention and if it is indeed what I suspected then I would deal with it. No sooner had I finish the thought when I felt even more pressure pushing on my left knee tenfold, then a pull back and a hard push again and again. The bus was at a traffic light not moving. I took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. I set my face and deliberately looked while slowly casing his whole body noting his budding erection. I met his eyes and lustful leer fiercely with what my daughters call "The Dead Face" and "Do Not Fuck with me eyes." Mr. No Words backed off and back down immediately. I rang the bell for my stop. I looked up at him again dead face and got up from my seat. He moved back and to the far side where he first stood ensuring our bodies would not touch, so much so that he was squeezing himself. I laughed inwardly but kept a serious outer demeanor as I maneuvered my way through the crowd and out the bus. I did not look back.


I hate dealing with that shit.

Chuck it up to another day in the life of a city commuter.

Author: D.S.B.S.Rhapsody©All rights reserved.

Jul 12, 2016

18 Adapting to the Alternative - Construction Season:

Construction, it is something one has to factor into their repertoire when living in the city and commuting. It can be a trial on ones patience, time and tolerance unless you approach all the diversions and adaptations you have to make to accommodate the necessary changes with acceptance. Thus was the approach I took when I knew 2 months prior via email of the coming construction that will impact me on my route to work.
The beginning:
On June 17th I worked late and came out and walked right into the Italian Festival in full swing. Clueless I walked along with the crowd to satisfy my curiosity after 15 minutes boredom set in and I turned around and headed in the direction that would take me home. It was then I noticed the additional barricades and signs notifying pedestrians of the coming construction to commence June 20th.  In my head I began to plan for the coming Monday June 20th. I start work at 10 am so my intention was to leave home by 8 am to accommodate all the diversions, detours and passengers confusion that will occur as a result. Sure enough it was pandemonium. Streetcars were replaced by buses with 75% less space capacity. Passengers were irritated, impatient and confused by the route detours and how they would be able to access their particular destination point, they were not prepared and the adjustment did not come easy.
I was prepared for the changes. I listened to the route attendant on the first day explaining the bus detours route and selected the option that best work for me. I was not pressed for time as I had left in early to accommodate the madness I know would ensue. I was 5 blocks to my job. The bus stopped 3 blocks shy of my destination which meant I had to walk 3 blocks to work. In the evening after work the process was pretty much the same. I had to walk 3 blocks to the nearest active bus stop. I walked 6 blocks a day and on days when buses were delayed which happened a couple of times I walked 11 blocks. I did this from June 20 – July 11th and I found that although I was tired at the end of each day it was not so bad. Sure it meant I reached home later and traffic was a bear at some points. However I adapted well. I think in part because I was prepared for it and I adjusted my thinking and just accepted that for a period of time I will have to deal with changes. The reality was there was little I could do to change the route interruptions due to the construction however I had all the control on how I dealt with the situation and the changes necessary to moving forward. Now things are back to normal and I have the gift of the lesson imparted by the experience.
My point:
Accept the things you cannot change and change the things you can. Find a way to adapt and keep it moving.
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